Israeli English

It took me awhile but I think that I finally understand what Israelis are saying to me when they speak English.  You would think that this would be easy considering we're speaking the same language, but in fact everything they say has an entirely different meaning from what you'd expect. See for yourself. I've translated each example into perfect English.

• "The weather is shiny." Translation: It's sunny outside.

• "Feel good." Translation: Feel better.

• "You're eating movies." Translation: I dare say you're living in a dream world. 

•  "You're full." Translation: You're not a size 2 or 4.

• "The soda is cute." (Not the bottle itself, but the taste is cute). Translation: The soda is quite tasty. 

• "From where are you?" Translation (if said from an Israeli guy): I see that you have a non-Israeli accent so I'm going to try to sleep with you. Is it working?

• "You're from New York?" Translation: You're from some place in America that I hope is close to NY because that's the only place I know of in the U.S. that has a lot of Jews. 
• I say, No I'm from Maryland. 
• The Israeli says either "Is that near New York?"  OR: "Is that on the West Coast?"

• "Why you make aliyah?" Translation: What are you crazy? You're from the U.S. why would you come here. I'd give my left arm to get paid as much as they do in the U.S. Are you aware we don't have any good Mexican food or Target?

• "You went on Taglit (Birthright)?" Translation: So do you sleep with guys quickly?
• Me: Did you go on Taglit?  Translation: So have you slept with an American girl?